Why do sewers make terrible runners?
They always have a stitch in their side.
What do you call a dog with spring allergies?
What animal makes the best pizza dough?
Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
Which president loved to take baths?
Why did the invisible man turn down a job offer?
Why do kittens know so much about church?
What did the group of hobbits name their band?
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
What did the astronaut say to the three-headed alien?
Why did the person sit on the clock?
Where do chips wear socks?
Where do monkeys take their kids to play?
What do you call a horse that plays the violin?
What happens to a dog that keeps eating bits off of the table?
What did the ocean sing at karaoke?
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
Where does the pepperoni go on vacation?
What do you call a wolf that gets lost?
What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?
Who do fish hire to play at their weddings?