Where do you go when you need an excuse to get out of something?
A lie-brary.
What day of the week takes nothing seriously?
What happened when the owl lost his voice?
What's a gastrologist's favorite punctuation mark?
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
How do you talk to a giant?
What type of vehicle should you use for a fall hayride?
Why do spiders always know the answer to everything?
Which dogs are the best at getting girls?
What do you call it when cell phones have poor hitting averages in baseball?
Why couldn't x and y find each other at the airport?
What kind of flowers should you not give on Valentine's Day?
Why did the God of Thunder need to stretch his muscles so much when he was a kid?
Why did the judge send the turtle to jail?
What is a horse's favorite sport?
What should you name your daughter born on Christmas?
Which bureau of the US government has the best breath?
What's a dog's least favorite kind of currency?
What do skeletons say to each other for good luck?
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?